


The Right Questions

by centrifuge



Category: Star Trek (2009), Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Humor, M/M, Meme, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-13
Updated: 2011-06-13
Packaged: 2017-10-20 09:15:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/211167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/centrifuge/pseuds/centrifuge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Or, twenty-two times Spock said no, and one time Kirk said yes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Right Questions

**Author's Note:**

> It was supposed to be a 5+1, but my math is not so great. D:

1.

“Spock, give me a hand with this.” Kirk didn’t look up from the corpse he was dragging. Spock looked askance at the unconscious attacker he’d slung over his shoulder.  
“No,” he replied.

 

2.  
“Well, I think it’s pretty obvious that we—“  
“No,” Spock interrupted, and put a big red frowny face on the last resort planet they’d visited. “You are still not allowed back there.”

 

3.  
“Heeeey Spock, do you ever—“  
“No.”

 

4.  
“Do you ever say anything besides ‘no’?” Kirk burst out in exasperation, slamming his PADD on the table harder than was probably good for it.  
“No,” Spock said, just for the hell of it.

 

5.  
“But what if we go back and—“  
“No,” Spock said, and pushed down hard on Kirk’s shoulder until he sat down, and stared up at him with stark and bloodshot eyes.

 

6.  
“You from around here?” Kirk said to the Ambassador’s aide, his eyes lingering on the peachy sheen of her shoulders. “I mean, we should probably spend some time comparing star charts.”  
Spock appeared behind the girl’s left shoulder and mouthed “No,” so menacingly that Kirk’s smirk froze into something completely unflattering, and she tittered and walked away. Kirk made a rude face at Spock, and he inclined his head in response.  
“I was just—“  
“No.”

 

7.  
Kirk passed a form over his shoulder to Spock, who felt it hit his shoulder and took it out of the captain’s hand. “Do you ever get tired of being so negative?”  
“No.” Spock allowed himself a private smile.

 

8.  
“So the plan is to—“  
“No,” Spock said, and pushed his hand from the base to the listening post on the closest moon.

 

9.  
“But I thought you were dating Uhura,” Kirk said with obvious confusion, watching her step closer to Bones and watching his head dip intimately toward hers.  
“No,” Spock replied, surprised at how easy it was to say.

 

10.  
“No,” Spock said sternly, and Kirk sheepishly replaced the panel surrounding the surveillance controls.

 

11.  
“No!” Spock dove and tackled Kirk to the floor just as the suicide bomber detonated his charge.

 

12.  
“No,” Spock took the makeshift incendiary device from Kirk’s hands and converted it back into a tricorder. “We need this.”  
“I hate waiting,” Kirk sighed.

 

13.  
“Are you ever going to stop interrupt—“  
“No,” Spock said. “Occasionally,” he amended.

 

14.  
“Has there been any change in her condition?” Kirk asked softly, sitting next to Spock, close enough to prop him up with his body. Spock let his tired muscles relax a bit and leaned against Kirk.  
“No,” Spock said, his eyes watching for the slightest flicker of movement from her face.

 

15.  
“No,” Spock looked down at his hands and blushed.

 

16.  
“Isn’t this a great idea?” Kirk crowed, suspended from the underside of the Bird of Prey in a completely unsafe manner, arc welding what looked to be a nuclear warhead to the hull.  
“No,” Spock said fervently.

 

17.  
“Spock, do you know what this is?”  
“No,” Spock frowned, taking the device from Kirk and turning it over in his hands. “But I estimate that I will in approximately ten minutes and forty-three seconds.”

 

18.  
“No.” Spock took the incendiary device from Kirk’s hands and converted it back into a comm badge.

 

19.  
“No.” Spock took the incendiary device from Kirk’s hands and converted it back into a phaser.

 

20.  
“No.” Spock took the incendiary device from Kirk’s hands and converted it back into a bottle of whiskey and a dirty rag. “How many times must I tell you?”  
“I didn’t realize you wanted that whiskey,” Kirk replied, amused.  
“Captain, what you do not know about me could fill a black hole.” Spock tilted the bottle back, drinking deeply before passing it to Kirk. “But I do know that you hate waiting.”  
“You never cease to amaze me with your dazzling leaps of logic.” Kirk took a drink and passed the bottle back.  
“I aim to please.”  
“I aim for the heart, mostly,” Kirk said thoughtfully. “But yours is in a different place.”  
“So?”  
“Nothing,” Kirk kicked a rock and smiled a small, private smile that Spock couldn’t quite fathom.

 

21.  
Kirk smiled winningly at the Kavortian priestess, and she rested a purple hand on his bicep in a way that made Spock’s this-will-only-end-in-tears alarm start ringing furiously in his head.  
“Captain, if I may have a word?” Spock grabbed Kirk firmly above the elbow and guided him out of the guest hall.  
“Sure, Spock. Is your Vulcan-sense tingling? Is trouble brewing with the Klingons?”  
“I predicted an eighty-three percent certainty that you would sleep with that priestess if I allowed your shameless flirtation to continue,” Spock said, hurrying him down the corridor. He spied a custodial closet and opened the door, flinging Kirk in.  
“Hey! What the fuck are you doing?!”  
“I’ll return for you at the close of the ceremony, in one-point-two hours.” He closed the door and turned the lock with a snick of tumblers falling into place.  
“Why can’t you just say an hour and twelve minutes like a normal person? Hey! Let me out of here!”  
“No.” Spock said through the crack in the door. “You will cease this sort of behavior if I have to prevent you from it myself.”

 

22.  
“You can’t stand it when I look at anybody else that way, can you?” Kirk said, panting. He licked a stripe up Spock’s flushed neck and he gasped.  
“No,” Spock growled, pulling his head down to bite at his mouth, kissing and bruising at equal turns. Kirk had never been more turned on in his life.

 

+1.  
“Spock,” Kirk said softly, running his fingertips over the black fringe at his temple, “Can you imagine living without me?”  
“I see you have learned to ask the right kind of questions,” Spock said, lacing their fingers together and nuzzling Kirk’s jaw.  
“Yes,” Kirk replied, and Spock felt the muscles shift under his skin when he smiled.


End file.
